New Couch

Thank you, Humans, for installing this new couch in our private, members-only Cat club, sometimes erroneously referred to as a front porch.

What’s that, Humans? You want to sit on our couch?

No, you may not.

First, you are not members, membership is by invitation only and, even if we were to invite you, the club fees amount to more cans of tuna than you can afford.

Second, the only remaining cushion is reserved for our esteemed club member Quicksilver.

–Phelps and Darth

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Darkening

This sheet is still whitish, but I am definitely darkening it with my midnight fur.

Just a few more weeks and it will be perfect.

What’s that? My Humans will toss it in the wash before I achieve my aesthetic vision of a sheet that glistens like the Hope Diamond?

Pffft… If they haven’t done it yet, what makes you think they’ll do it soon?

–Darth Vader