If you had been serious about straightening out the comforter, Human Mommy…
…you would have done so before our nap marathon commenced.
–Darth Vader and Finnegan
Peekaboo, annoyingly bright morning sun. I see you.
Now I don’t and that’s much better.
Of course I share my bed with the Millenial Kitten Princess. We Cat Queens are nothing if not magnanimous.
No the Princess may not have a pillow.
Magnamity has its limits.
If you are a Woofie, you may need to wait for the Humans to offer you a pillow.
If you’re a Cat, you simply take possession of what’s rightfully yours.
This sheet is still whitish, but I am definitely darkening it with my midnight fur.
Just a few more weeks and it will be perfect.
What’s that? My Humans will toss it in the wash before I achieve my aesthetic vision of a sheet that glistens like the Hope Diamond?
Pffft… If they haven’t done it yet, what makes you think they’ll do it soon?
Ever wake up only to feel that there is a large, uninvited presence behind you? You could be right or you could still be dreaming.
Either way, it’s probably best just to fall back asleep and hope that it doesn’t snore or slobber.
It doesn’t hurt to let your Humans on your bed once in awhile as their legs make for excellent pillows. Just don’t let them become territorial.
It’s your bed not theirs.
Sure, Kitties, Humans are there to serve us. We all know that.
Still, you can demonstrate your magnamity by lending a helping paw when the Humans try, ineffectually, to perform routine household tasks, like changing the sheets on our bed.
Silly Humans! How on earth do they expect us Kitties to sleep soundly and awaken refreshed without a fine sheen of feline fur on our sheets?
Happy Monday, Humans! Don’t feel too bad about abandoning us to go to the mysterious place you call work.
Our bed is a lot more comfortable without you taking up so much space.
–Finnegan, Quicksilver, Luna and Darth Vader
Scissors, Humans? Are you kidding me? This box you ordered has been on the floor for weeks. It is now my bed, perfectly contoured to my furry body.
I bet you don’t even remember what’s in it.