What are you doing in my private room, Little One?
What do you mean your room, Big Sis? As far as I can see, the ottoman is mine.
Shall we fight for It?
Ouch, Little One! I’d fight, but I hear Human Mommy opening the fridge…
–Luna and Lily
If you go to the beach…
…no matter what else you do…
…no matter where else you go…
…it’s a fine, fine day.
–Thunder, Guest Contributor
Bored with your current situation?
Try adopting a fresh perspective.
Turtledom in progress:
Did you have to uproot so many hostas, Humans?
This used to make for a nice hunting blind…er…bird watching spot.
I appreciate the juxtaposition of the rocks and the diggable substrate.
The vegetation is quite nice and, if I understand correctly, edible.
My private pool, though, needs a cleaning and the proffered lettuce is not up to my standards.
3.5 stars, at best.
–Finnegan and Princess Turtle
P.S. We servents…er…Humans covered Turtledom with a strong plastic mesh to prevent any unwanted incursions into the Princess’s territory. Human Daddy is hard at work on a latching chicken wire top.
I got lost–real lost. The ground below me was hard and hot and impossible to dig.
I’d almost given up when a Human saw me in the middle of what he called the “street” and placed me in a bucket.
I didn’t exactly love the bucket, but I guess it’s better than what Human Daddy says would have happened to me if I’d remained in the “street.”
Things looked up a bit when the Humans set up what Human Mommy calls my “temporary luxury suite.”
I mean, it’s okay–not exactly “luxury,” but maybe 3 stars out of 5.
The Humans have promised me an outdoor Turtle enclosure. This sounds much preferable to my 3-star suite.
In the meantime, I’ll be burrowing myself in my new substrate. (Good call on the substrate, Humans.)
I can’t wait to move to my outdoor Turtledom.
Chop, chop Humans!
–Princess Box Turtle (who thus far lacks a name and is not pleased about this)
How will you know if your dishes are really clean unless we sniff-inspect them for you?
You’re welcome, Humans.
–Chief Inspector Lily and Lieutenant Sniffer Luna
Crepes and Cafe-au-lait for breakfast?
Don’t mind if I do.
Sometimes you have to swallow your pride and ask for help.
Help, Human Mommy! The Millenial Meowie is swallowing my dinner!
What’s that? No, I can’t politely ask her to move.
The Millenial Meowie has murder mittens!
(Thanks to Samantha Murdoch for this wonderful description of Meowie paws. Check out samanthamurdochblog.)
What do you mean you are going to “Work” and don’t have time to fetch my first Meowmosa of the weekend?
But it’s Caturday!!
“Overtime,” you say.
I hate “Overtime.”
Closed doors are an affront to our dignity as Cats.
I command you to rectify this situation immediately, Human Mommy.