Adorable

Bet you wish you could tuck your front paws so adorably, Humans!

Well, you can’t. Your phsyionomy doesn’t permit it and, even if it did, you need to be covered in silky, feline fur for this position to work.

Feel free to console yourselves by drinking in my adorableness.

–Luna

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Helping Out

Sure, Kitties, Humans are there to serve us. We all know that.

Still, you can demonstrate your magnamity by lending a helping paw when the Humans try, ineffectually, to perform routine household tasks, like changing the sheets on our bed.

Silly Humans! How on earth do they expect us Kitties to sleep soundly and awaken refreshed without a fine sheen of feline fur on our sheets?

–Luna

Ageless

Human Mommy, you spend ages in the bathroom in the morning, applying various creams, powders, and Cat-Knows-What to your huge, naked face, in a futile attempt to appear “younger.”

May I make a suggestion?

Just grow out your face fur to cover your wrinkles.

Seriously, look at me. I’m positively ageless.

–Amber