I know you’re excited about your squeaky candy cane, Cosmo, but can you cool it on the tail wagging?
Some of us are trying to nap here.
Sure, Kitties, Humans are there to serve us. We all know that.
Still, you can demonstrate your magnamity by lending a helping paw when the Humans try, ineffectually, to perform routine household tasks, like changing the sheets on our bed.
Silly Humans! How on earth do they expect us Kitties to sleep soundly and awaken refreshed without a fine sheen of feline fur on our sheets?
Sometimes you need to be firm with your Humans. For example, your Human Mommy may tell you that she wants to roll onto her side for her afternoon nap.
Tell her no. Remind her that you are comfortably installed on her chest and that it is her duty, her honor, to continue to stroke your head and muzzle until you you tire of her ministrations.
Under no circumstances is she to alter her position and thereby inconvenience you, the Cat.