Choose your bachelor pad wisely. If you like a bit of action, don’t move too far out to the country–youthful Kittens will keep you young.
On the other paw, be sure that your pad is protected from the hurly-burly of the youngsters’ catnip-fueled disputes. Kittens may do fine with a mere 18 hours of sleep daily, but you require a minimum of 20 hours.
Most importantly, make sure that your pad is in close proximity to the best place in the house, i.e. the kitchen.
Do the younger Cats display insufficient respect to you, the Catriarch, ever since they discovered that your previous Humans removed your claws because they loved their furniture more than you?
Time to make a Woofie ally.
Do your parents not understand your style? For example, are they constantly telling you to fix your ears because they’re inside-out?
Don’t pay them any mind. They mean well, but they’re too old to know that it’s trendy to expose the pink insides of your floppy ears to match your pretty pink collar.
Elder Cats may linger over dinner just as long as we please. Younger Cats must wait respectfully in the waiting box, sometimes referred to as a bar, until we cede our place.
Such are the privileges of age.
Younger cats will play and play and play, ignoring dinner in favor of frivolous games.
We, the elder cats, approve of youthful foolishness as it means more wet food for us.
–Amber, Darth Vader, Quicksilver and Phelps
Old adages don’t necessarily apply to the modern world. Have you heard the one about age before beauty? It only applies when the beauty is NOT a youthful tortie who makes you wait an eternity you don’t have to drink from the bathtub faucet.
When you are a young cat, you want to stalk birds all day every day of the year. As you mature, you realize that it is better to stay inside on chilly winter mornings, particularly if your humans are frying up turkey bacon. There is more than one way to get your fill of bird.